Fading away

Hi... today I re-realized that I'm just fading away (that's kind o' anti-kurt isn't it?) I guess I'm just to fuckin' tired of people pushing me around for some stupid things, so, I'm wondering if, at this right moment, I'm a kid or I'm an adult??? I mean, by this time, I should take care of my self, in fact, I'm doing it, so it's stupid to get so pissed 'bout other's saying to "make me feel better", when it's all about hurting me and taking me to the edge...

Today I just remember one of those songs you used to liste at 10, but at his moment is kind o' true... =S (is it normal?)

Do you ever feel like breaking down?
Do you ever feel out of place?
Like somehow you just don't belong
And no one understands you
Do you ever wanna run away?
Do you lock yourself in your room?
With the radio on turned up so loud
That no one hears you screaming

No you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels all right
You don't know what it's like
To be like me

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life

Do you wanna be somebody else?
Are you sick of feeling so left out?
Are you desperate to find something more?
Before your life is over
Are you stuck inside a world you hate?
Are you sick of everyone around?
With their big fake smiles and stupid lies
While deep inside you're bleeding

No you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels all right
You don't know what it's like
To be like me

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life

No one ever lied straight to your face
And no one ever stabbed you in the back
You might think I'm happy but I'm not gonna be okay
Everybody always gave you what you wanted
You never had to work it was always there
You don't know what it's like, what it's like

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like (what it's like)

Is it right to grow up?
Is it right to cry?
Is it right to die for a little bit?
Is it right to get off of the wrong people?
Is it right to get off of all people? even when you love some of those?
Is it right to cry?
Is it right to be on the edge?
Is it right to prefer silence?

I just don't really know that at this point...